Sex Criminals #5 – Review

By: Matt Fraction (writer), Chip Zdarsky (artist), Becka Kinzie (Color Flatting)

The Story: Who will live? Who will die? Whose weakness is their nipples!? All this and a terrifying encounter in a diner, this week in SEX CRIMINALS!

The Review: Hello there, naughty monkeys, it’s been a while.

No really, it’s been a while.

The last time I reviewed Sex Criminals was way back in the start of January. While I’m going to try not to let this affect my review, I think it’s worth mentioning that it’s a little hard to stick a landing after a nine week delay. Indeed, this issue concludes the first arc and begins a three-month hiatus for the series. I don’t know what led to this development, but it’s never good when your ‘season finale’ is floating so far from the energy of the story’s first eighty percent. Luckily Fraction and Zdarsky have helped us to really get to know our protagonists, so they’re about as fresh as any character could be, but skimming your favorite scenes from previous issues wouldn’t be out of line.

In any case, Sex Criminals #5 is a return to the loved and the familiar in terms of its visuals. While Chip Zdarsky’s style never bowled me over the way it did many, you can’t deny that he brings a unique look and a relatable energy to our strange, broken, beautiful wanna-be crooks. In fact, while it may be absence making the heart grow fonder, this might be some of Zdarsky’s best technical work on this book. More than ever, it’s the art that conveys the closeness of Jon and Suzie’s bizarre love affair. And it’s not just their chemistry that comes through. Suzie’s grit, compassion, and humor are all on display alongside some charming looks from Kegelface, Jon, and a very important young student.

Shading and momentum are Zdarsky’s other words of the day. With the story reaching the end of the first act, things are getting a little dramatic and the art delivers an appropriate sense of weight, visually and emotionally. Panels like Suzie explaining the plan, reassuring Jon, or losing herself in the library are all good examples.

You’ll also get the visual gags that have practically defined this series. I don’t know whether Spider-Riker is Jon or Suzie’s kink, or if Jon just happens to have the components for some reason, but it’s pretty awesome. That said, Suzie’s somewhat risqué apron looks a bit more like an unreasonably specific set of overalls.

Oh? Did I mention that we’re finally out of the freakin’ bank?! Thank god!

This issue opens with our Jon and Suzie captured by the Sex Police and sees us through the final days of their planning. It’s rewarding to finally see things coming together for this story. Cracks are starting to appear in the status quo, our villainess is beginning to come into focus, and Jon and Suzie’s lives may never be the same again. But even as the walls begin to close in, Fraction takes this issue to remind you that Suzie not only is, but should be our main character. Though her choices have been questionable of late, there’s no denying that what drew most of us to this series was Suzie and the quiet resilience within her. Now that it’s being tested, she shines like Jon’s dick…that sounded better in my head.

That said, while it’s cathartic to see the plot advance, it’s depressing to be celebrating that, especially in an issue that actually contains so little progression. You see, while Matt Fraction does a solid job of highlighting what’s exhilarating about the events of the issue, most of the meat of the story takes place in the past. Just because this issue ends on a fairly badass line doesn’t change the fact that this should have been the ending to issue three, at the latest.

Sex Criminals is yet another comic written for the trade. It’s going to be a unique trade, that’s a given, but unless Image takes the Saga route and offers the first volume at a discount, I can’t really see myself suggesting a book that feels this padded to someone. I hate bringing money into things, but even if it were free, you can’t deny a repetitive quality in the first five issues. Maybe the presumed Sex Criminals Omnibus will justify this slow build, but, especially if you’re ready to yell at the screen right now, consider Scott Snyder’s The Wake. The first volume of The Wake told a clear and complete story that simultaneously satisfied and set up for the next chapter in the story. In the same number of issues, Sex Criminals is roughly where The Wake was after issue two and really only beats it for the depth of its characters.

On the character side of things, Suzie doesn’t come across as the smartest in this issue. Pretty much every warning that things would go wrong went off this week and yet the heist goes on. These giant red signs might have felt less weird if Jon and Suzie hadn’t received them prior to the events of issue one, but to throw them in at the end like this undermines our understanding of the situation, and not in a clever way. Admittedly, one is certain to be relevant down the line and the other gives us one of the series’ funniest moments, but Fraction is far too good of a writer for that to justify such a questionable choice.

I also don’t know if I like what we learn about Jon this issue. One of my favorite elements of this story has been the growing anger within Jon. It was a great character flaw that didn’t turn you off from the character but wasn’t excused either. Fraction’s choice to turn it into a medical condition certainly sets up for some drama later on – if this was a relevant part of criminal activity Suzie probably should have known about it sooner – but it  really adds nothing to Jon’s character to diagnose it, takes up time,and slightly weakens the characters’ choices. As someone with ADHD who struggled with worries about overmedicating for a long time, I entirely understand Jon’s position but, whatever Fraction’s view is, this was a weird way to implement that concept.

The Conclusion: After an extended absence, Sex Criminals returns with more of the charm, wit, and style that endeared it to fans from the beginning. Unfortunately, the series fails to make good on its promises, leaving us with little more established than in issue one. Things are simply too slow and a couple of odd choices make this the most unstable installment yet.

Though Fraction returns to Suzie and what makes her great as the first volume winds down, Sex Criminals #5 stumbles badly at the finish line.

Grade: C+

- Noah Sharma